I have been thinking alot lately on what my goals are, what my dreams are, what I want to do…..and of course a few thoughts in there on what I don’t want to do! Ok maybe more than a few thoughts. I am guilty of praying very hard about things I really want and then praying very hard on things I don’t want to happen, to not happen. I am not saying this is bad at all. But I have just been thinking lately, that if we get so focused on our way, we may miss out on God’s blessings. If we are so focused on one outcome, and it doesn’t go that way, it can get us all worked up. I know I kind of unconsciously justify my plan to God, “if it goes this way this will happen, and that will happen, and it will just turn out great!!” I am a planner and like to know all the details of what is going to go down. So I tend to plan out my life. I will be going along with the right attitude and then something happens that may derail my plan. Then I start stressing, worrying, and praying even harder than my plan will work. Then in a funny way all my planning doesn’t bring forth less stress, (like planned!) but more, because I think this attitude distances me from God. I get so wrapped up in how I am going to make my plan work, that I let go of God’s hand, thinking that my way is going to be better.
I do all of this unintentional. I know God’s way is better, but I think human nature is to trust in self. I think God lets me try it myself because he knows I wont make it to far :). And its true, I don’t. Before long I realize that I have been trying to do things myself and decided, that it’s not working so hot! Then I start wondering why can’t life go smoother?! Why can’t we always be happy, and why can’t we always be doing good things for Christ, instead of messing up so much? But really, if everything was perfect, would we want to go to heaven? I know for me I can’t wait until I get to meet Jesus and am in a place where everything is perfect. This life isn’t perfect, but heaven is, and it’s forever. If this life was perfect, would I want to go there? Would I rely on Jesus?
There has been one thing that has been bothering me lately. Do you have anything that you say, “I can’t do that.” I have been struggling with that one thing. I could do alot of things, but that one, I don’t think I can do. So when I think about all these things, I know deep down I could do it with God’s help. Its not likely it will happen, but I blow it up in my mind. What if?
In Pslam 18:32-33 it says: “It is God that girdeth me with strength, and maketh my way perfect. He maketh my feet like hinds’ feet, and setteth me upon my high places.” I know God will be with me in whatever my path entails. I just need to stop trusting in my own plans and start trusting in his. I need to start praying that he will give me “shoes” for the path, instead of asking him to make my path easy. I would much rather be on a hard path with God’s help, than a path of my choosing with no help. So here I am again, surrendering my plans to God and asking for his help. I know I need to stop worrying about everything and trust in God. It is much harder to do than say! I love the song Blessings by Laura Story. It fits so well with the post, and its such a great reminder for me that I wanted to share. Hope this encourages you wherever you may be on your path!